Sat 29 Jul 00 0:16
Steve Quarrella
THINK YOU'VE HAD A BAD DAY????
When you THINK you have a bad day, remember this ...I was taking a
shower when my 2-year-old son came into the bathroom and wrapped himself
in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so I ran
for my camera and took a few shots. They came out so well that I had
copies made and included one with each of our Christmas cards. Days
later, a relative called about the picture, laughing hysterically and
suggesting I take a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was
shocked to discover that in addition to my son, I had captured my
reflection in the mirror ---wearing nothing but a camera!
MY FOOTSTEPS?
An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her
then-four-year-old daughter. On the way to preschool, the doctor had
left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up
and began playing with it. Be still, my heart, thought my friend, my
daughter wants to follow in my footsteps! Then the child spoke into the
instrument: "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?"
A WISE LITTLE GIRL
A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm
Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must
say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and
said, "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I
was, but mother says I'm not."
TOO ROUGH
A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the
boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're
too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and
asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"
THUMB SUCKING
A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb,
though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to
painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried
threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb,
your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon." Later that day,
walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a
bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke
to her saying, "Uh-oh .. I know what you've been doing.
SO KEEP THE SINGING DOWN, OK?
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the
way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
Return to The Skeptic Tank's main Index page.
The views and opinions stated within this web page are those of the
author or authors which wrote them and may not reflect the views and
opinions of the ISP or account user which hosts the web page. The
opinions may or may not be those of the Chairman of The Skeptic Tank.